If Florida were a car, it would be

A neon green convertible Ford Mustang.

It's flashy.

It's trashy.

It's all Florida baby.

Let's take a ride on I-75 with the top down and blast some Creed!

And by Creed, I mean Creed and not Creedence Clearwater Revival!!

If Florida were a cake, it would be

A Publix cake!

In Red Velvet...and in the shape of a cross!

Jesus, you're delicious

If Florida were a movie, it would be

Larry Clark's "Bully" based on the 1993 real life murder of Bobby Kent, which happened in Fort Lauderdale.

Too make a shocking and intriguing story super short, South Florida teens decide to kill the bully in their group.

There is lots of sex, drugs, nudity, violence, and humidity.

Welcome to Florida.

And if you don't know, now you know.

If Florida were a soda, it would be

Wal-Mart's refreshing answer to Mountain Dew---Mountain Lightning!!
Why would anyone want to "do the dew" when they can "do the lightning"? It's a no-brainer.

Neon color? Check!
Unforgettable name? Double check!
Ingredients include rust-cleaning agents and yellow-5? Super check!

If Florida were an object, it would be