Story of the Day

Oh this is a good one!

A guy in Tampa called 911, not for an emergency, but because he wanted someone to...uhm....talk dirty with. Ah!

He claims that his cell phone ran out of minutes and he was "in the mood", so he called 911--seems logical right?

After calling 911 four times and being hung up on by traumatized 911 operators, police were dispatched to his home and arrested him on charges of making a false 911 call.

I don't EVEN want to know HOW he used his cell phone minutes when he had them!

Read more here

Story of the Day

An Okeechobee man was convicted earlier this week of murdering his son-in-law after using his weight as a defense.

Edward Ates claimed he was "too fat" to have run up an down a flight of stairs to commit the crime and flee from the crime scene.

How fat was this guy? 288 lbs on a 5' 8" frame...pretty hefty.

Just nearly not as hefty to solidify his argument.

I love Floridiots!

Check out more at Fla. Man Convicted in Fat Defense Trial

PS: Nobody does "too fat" like Eddie Murphy and "The Klumps"!!

Story of the Day

It was announced earlier this week that the largest solar plant in the United States will be in Florida.

Can't say it takes a rocket scientist, or in this case, alternative energy scientist, to put a solar plant in the Sunshine State.

In order to bring attention to this important project, President Obama visited Arcadia today.

It's nice to hear some good, drama-free news coming out of Florida today.

This solar plant is sure to create more jobs all the while helping out the environment!

Read all about it here

Story of the Day

There's nothing cute and furry about today's story (no matter how hilarious those darn raccoons were in "The Great Outdoors").

A 74 year old woman in Lakeland was attacked by a gang of five raccoons.

Yikes!

It all started when the woman tried get the raccoons to leave her front door.

The raccoons jumped on her, causing the poor old lady to fall down.

Once on the ground, the raccoons continued to attack, causing serious injuries and bite marks all over her little old body.

The sheriff's department is currently looking for those pesky guys.

Find more here, where you can see amateur video of a pack of raccoons that may be the attackers!

Story of the Day

In the epic "There Will Be Blood", the main character uses a child as a marketing ploy whilst negotiating for oil.

The following story does not stray to far from this plot line, so we'll call it "There Will Be Idiots".

A woman in Suntree was charged with neglecting her 6 year old son after a tow truck driver told the police she offered to sell her child in exchange for gas money.

Is gas REALLY that expensive in Florida? Me thinks not.

I love this story for it's ridiculousness but I hate it because I feel sorry for the little boy who has a mental case for a mom.

Read more here and check out the video that accompanies the article.

Story of the Day

Thank you Florida for not letting me down! Especially the men and women of law enforcement!

Cops in Lakeland were caught playing a Wii video bowling game during a drug raid.

Who says you can't have fun on the job??

The home that the cops raided had a surveillance camera, and the video clearly shows officers repeatedly stopping on the job to play the video game.

In defense of the cops, maybe they have PS3's at home and wanted to check out what the Wii is like?

Also, was the video game on when the cops raided the house or did they start up the game on their own?

Anyways, read more at Fla. cops caught playing video game during raid

And don't you love that Wii cake??! Hilarious.

Story of the Day

Why Florida? Why?!!

A group of Floridiots calling themselves "Personhood Florida" are trying to add a new amendment to Florida's Constitution that would make it a crime to take birth control pills in Florida.

They want the constitution to define someone as a "person," regardless of age or health status, "from the beginning of the biological development of that human being."

These people are nutso! They consider taking the pill as a "chemical abortion".

You can read their "reasoning" behind their genius idea here

Ok....hmmm.....so they would rather you get knocked up and THEN get a real abortion??

And would it be a crime to use a condom?

And are they going to take in all of the unwanted babies born because birth control was illegal??

I'm sure this group spends TONS of money trying to promote this stupid amendment, meanwhile thousands of Florida's children who were unwanted are hungry and without any financial assistance.

What would Jesus REALLY do, Florida??

Story of the Day

Anyone for a BK "Anus" burger??

Well, one poor guy who WAS in the mood for some BK probably wish he hadn't been, after being shot 4 times while being parked at a BK drive-thru in Opa-locka last night.

Two scary dudes with AK-47s (wtf!) drove up to the guys car and started firing.

Luckily, the victim was able to drive himself to the hospital.

I wonder if he waited to get his food before driving to the hospital?
Who wants to eat cold fries, right?

According to the article you can read here, this is the second shooting at a BK in the Miami-Dade area in just this week.

No reports on whether the shooters wore red plastic boots and white face paint.

Story of the Day

This story came to my attention from my homegirl Katie Jean via another source but I had share!!

Because it involves Bell Shoals Baptist Church, a "megachurch" in our hometown of Brandon!

Bell Shoals sucks big time---they hold "gay conversion" classes and spread lies and hatred, AND high sugar diets.

You see, the church replaced their 10 (yes 10) soda vending machines from Pepsi products to Coke products because

here it comes....

Pepsi "opposes traditional family values".

You know, like the value of being true to yourself, loving thy neighbor, not passing judgment on others, lying, etc.

We need to pray for Bell Shoals Baptist Church---they need our thoughts to save THEM from stupidity.

Read more at Brandon Baptist church pulls plug on Pepsi products

Story of the Day

An alcohol monitoring device being worn by a 17 year old girl from DeFuniak Springs (up in the Panhandle) was set off, by

Wait for it.......

Hairspray!

The judge found that the teen's exposure to hairspray at her hair salon job caused the device to detect alcohol, and thus, went off.

The girl was originally arrested for drunk driving. Her horrible decision to drive drunk caused her to run a stop sign and hit a tree, which tragically killed one of her passengers.

Hairspray triggering an alcohol monitoring device.....thanks DeFuniak Springs! Now I've heard everything.

Read the rest at Judge: Hairspray falsely triggered alcohol-monitoring device

Story of the Day

Scientists in Sarasota are asking boaters to help them look for a robot that has been lost in the Gulf of Mexico.

The robot is named Waldo and was not misplaced; it "mysteriously disappeared".....interesting....

Now instead of just watching out for sharks, now you have to look out for robots!

Find out how much the robot costs at Fla. boaters told to look out for AWOL robot

Story of the Day

One soda lover from Ormond Beach was in for an extra special treat when he found a frog (or a toad) in his can of Diet Pepsi.

Lucky for me, I'm a Coca-Cola girl.

The FDA says a test confirms that the amphibian was in the soda can, but is not sure how it got in there.

A Pepsi spokesperson says Pepsi stands by its manufacturing process and that the speed of the lines that produce the soda cans make 1,250 cans a minute--a speed too fast for a foreign object to get inside.

The frog finder is certain that the animal was in the can before he opened it.

Something tells me this guy is a phony and wants to spend some Pepsi money!

Read more (and check out the gross picture!) at FDA confirms frog or toad in Florida man Fred Denegri's Diet Pepsi can (what a long ass title for a silly story!)

Story of the Day

This story makes me sad, not because it involves drunk driving, but because it involves wasted fast food!

A woman in Crestview was arrested after parking her car at the end of a Whataburger drive-thru lane and passing out over a half eaten burger and french fries.

Luckily cops arrived and charged her with her 5th DUI.

She's a freakin' idiot!

This would have NEVER happened at the In-N-Out drive thru because it's always busy and people would be honking at you something serious. You wouldn't have a chance to pass out!

I happen to really like the title of this new story--you can read more at Woman didn't smell like alcohol, but car smelled like hamburger

And if you recognize the burgers in the photo above, you are awesome!

On a side note, our high school soccer coach was found passed out at the Steak N Shake drive thru!
So, this whole passing out in a drive thru deal isn't that new to me (so sad).

Story of the Day

Holy Hattori Hanzo!

Some chick in Land O' Lakes pulled a ninja sword on her boyfriend during a domestic dispute.

Apparently the girl's boyfriend was on the phone with his ex-wife and she wasn't having it.

Ninja girl says her guy slapped her first, but he says she started the fight and slapped her in defense.

Regardless, the slapping lead to the ninja sword which lead to a 911 call, which lead to this entry.

Unfortunately for us, the girl's mug shot photo does not include the sword or a ninja costume!

Check it out at Deputies: Pasco woman used ninja sword in fight with boyfriend

Story of the Day

When I read the headline on this story, I automatically knew it had to have happened in Florida.

A man was arrested in Clearwater after leaving two small children in his car while going to...here it comes...

a strip club

The kids, ages 3 and 4, were found unharmed but the police are unsure if the kids are related to the stripper enthusiast.

Maybe their mom works AT the strip club and he was just touching base with her about the kids?!

Find more at Police: Man leaves kids in car, goes to strip club

Story of the Day

To quote my personal hero Jerri Blank, "The bacon strip's sizzlin'!"

A lady working at a Perkins restaurant in Stuart (East Coast FL) was arrested after a co-worker saw her put 3 pounds of bacon in her purse.

3 pounds! Yummers!

When police booked her in jail, they found she also had drugs on her.

Check out the rest of the story, as well as the "delicious" mugshot of the bacon thief at Perkins employee arrested for stealing bacon

I've personally never eaten at a Perkin's but there was one down the road from my college and it just wasn't as appetizing as eating at, let's say, Shoney's.

Story of the Day

In the words of Billy Joel "We didn't start the fire" but this lady did! To herself!

A woman set herself on fire while at the Mall of the Americas in Miami yesterday.

The 43 year old woman poured flammable liquid on herself and subsequently suffered third degree burns on over 75% of her body.

Witnesses were understandably shocked at the sight of this woman walking very slowly and on fire.

Super freaky!

Read more at Woman Sets Self On Fire, Walks Around Miami Mall

And if you are a Harry Potter fan, check out this nuts HP themed parody of "We Didn't Start the Fire"--E for Effort, dude!

Story of the Day

Familiar with the saying "if it's too good to be true, it's probably not"?

Well that's exactly what happened at a Best Buy in Kissimmee when a bunch of shoppers showed up to buy a 52 inch high definition television for only $9.99!

The manager of the store told everyone waiting to get their hands on "cheap" TV that Best Buy was NOT honoring the online deal because it was a mistake.

That totally sucks because many businesses will give you the price a product is listed as, even if it's a mistake.

No news on how long the mistake was online for.

Read the article at A TV for $9.99? Best Buy Not Honoring Online Deal

Story of the Day

G.I. Ho!

The owner of a "dancing" troupe in Florida has just released footage of "G.I. Joe" star, and Tampa-raised, Channing Tatum, stripping.

Turns out Channing was a "dancer" for over a year for an all male revue called "Male Encounter" back in 1999.

What a bad name---not catchy like "Thunder Down Under!"

The video is pretty scandalous, considering he gets down to a thong and gyrates. Quite a bit.

Try not to laugh at how silly he looks in nothing but a thong and gym socks!

Check out the video HERE

Story of the Day

Jude Law's happy-go-lucky Vespa riding days have hit a bump, a baby bump you could say.

It's been announced that model Samantha Burke from Pensacola is pregnant with Jude's fourth child.

Jude and Samantha are not currently dating.

I'm not at all surprised Jude fell for the charms of a Florida girl.
What I am surprised about is that he wouldn't practice safe sex when he's worth a lot of money and there are a lot of ladies with bad intentions out there.

But not Samantha, because Florida girls are good girls *wink*

Check out the article at Lawyer: Florida Model Pregnant with Jude Law's Baby