Florida Jams

Story of the Day

In the words of Billy Joel "We didn't start the fire" but this lady did! To herself!

A woman set herself on fire while at the Mall of the Americas in Miami yesterday.

The 43 year old woman poured flammable liquid on herself and subsequently suffered third degree burns on over 75% of her body.

Witnesses were understandably shocked at the sight of this woman walking very slowly and on fire.

Super freaky!

Read more at Woman Sets Self On Fire, Walks Around Miami Mall

And if you are a Harry Potter fan, check out this nuts HP themed parody of "We Didn't Start the Fire"--E for Effort, dude!

FILF

Dexter Morgan is a blood-splatter analyst in the forensics department for the Miami Metro Police Department.

When not analyzing crime scenes, or cleaning up his own crime scenes, Dexter can be found hanging out with his girlfriend, dealing with his sister, and having flashbacks with his father.

He has a killer eye for detail and if you have it coming to you, Dexter will make sure you get it!

WTF Miami??

When the South Florida owner of "Geronimo", a beautiful brown and white horse, reported him missing, she didn't expect he would be found dead under a tree.

Apparently, 19 horses have been killed in Southeast Florida since January---and many believe they are being killed for their meat.

Although the police believe it is too premature to form a motive, a member of the SPCA believes that horses are being killed for their meat by people of different nationalities.

Miami is a melting pot of many, many cultures, and I guess in some of these cultures, eating meat is legal.

This is SO disgusting.

I hope Geronimo didn't die in vain, and that the awareness this story has brought will put an end to such a heinous crime.

Read more at Horses being killed in South Florida--for their meat?

Story of the Day

Warning: This story may cause excessive eye rolling

A girl named Kelly from Miami decided to look up her name on Facebook to see who else had it. Lucky for her, the only other person with her name was a boy living in Texas.

Their online friendship grew into romance (aww!) and boy Kelly went to visit girl Kelly in Florida.

Boy Kelly must have been swept away in the magic that is Florida because after his visit things got really serious and now they're getting married!

Read more at Facebook same name couple to wed

I'll admit this is a cute story--but it's just too much!

Like when couples dress exactly alike. It never ends good. Never.

Story of the Day

The only thing the following story and "The Bridges of Madison County" have in common is a bridge.

No sexy National Geographic photographers. No Italian stay at home wives. No tense and rainy red lights.

A couple of sex offenders are suing Miami-Dade County because they want to overturn a law that keeps them 2,500 feet from anyplace children are usually at (schools, playgrounds, etc.).

This restriction has forced an estimated 70 sex offenders to live under a bridge on the Julia Tuttle Causeway.

The bridge is one of the very few places they can live outside of the restricted areas.

I can't say I feel sorry for them. It's one thing to be homeless because you lost your job or you have a serious mental illness.

But to live in a tent because you raped someone? I'd let Clint as Dirty Harry Callahan take over from here, fo sho!

Read the rest of the article at Sex offenders under bridge sue Florida county

FILF

Saucy and sexy Blanche Devereaux is one of South Florida's sassiest residents.

She resides near Miami with her roommates Dorothy, Rose, and Sophia (another FILF).

Blanche is very popular with men, as well with her community.

She is involved with local plays and volunteer service projects with Rose and is a big fan of cheesecakes.

Thank YOU for being a friend, Ms. Devereaux!

FILF

Although Dave Barry was born in New York, he's been a syndicated columnist with the Miami Herald for many many years.
His hilarious columns even inspired a television show based on his life called "Dave's World". The show ran for four years with Harry Anderson playing Dave.

Dave's end of the year column was always a must-read for me growing up in Florida. He would go through the years' events by month and give his comedic perspective on politics, pop culture, etc.

You can enjoy Dave's columns here

Story of the Day

Florida is often connected to bizarre, and often unfortunate, stories---and this is no exception.

Police arrested an 18 year old kid from Miami for mutilating and killing 19 cats over the last 4 weeks. SO disturbing.
He was charged with 19 counts of felony animal cruelty and 4 counts of burglary. The judge also ordered he get a psych exam (DUH) and set his bail to about a quarter million dollars.

This isn't a crazy, silly Florida story I like to read. This one is just sick and sad.
At least they caught him now before more pets were killed. Who knows what else he could have started killing too.

You can read the whole article at Charges in Series of Cat Killings in Florida